Toasting-with-the-broiler anxiety crisis.

Finding-peanut-butter-in-fridge frustration crisis.

No-clean-cutlery-swish-around-in-the-dish-soaking-sink grossness crisis.

Hungry-but-too-fat-cat conflicted feelings crisis.

2:30am what-am-I-doing-with-my-life crisis.

Crisis crisis.

For Christmas I asked for a single word that fits on a poster and identifies anyone marginalized by sexual orientation and/or gender identity issues and their allies without offending or excluding anyone.

Plus more twitter status characters.

I feel like my tweets need a translation feed.

“My whole life is made of flame retardant plastic” = “Everything about me is fake and I don’t have a boyfriend.”

That would be… what?  A superiority complex because I don’t think people get me, or an inferiority complex because I don’t think I can communicate well?

Santa wants you to know that just because he learned how to email Mrs. Clause with his blackberry doesn’t mean that he goes in for all this social media bullshit, and this whole “bad in real life, good on twitter” stuff will not fly. He can see you when you’re sleeping. He’s the original dudecondo.com subscriber. Get real.

i hate everything you love.

you: You should have planned for that.
me: You should have known I wouldn’t.

Our cottage is on the lake too… but it also comes with wifi, cable, a hot-tub and a full kitchen.  And an extra family.